As musicians, most of us deal with conflicting and competing emotions and opinions of ourselves. When things are going well, we tend to feel as though we’re doing great. Conversely, when things don’t seem to go as we would like, we tend to judge ourselves pretty harshly.
Resting in the giftings God has given us isn’t easy. Because of our human nature, we tend to either praise our performance - or condemn our performance - a lot. Our self-esteem tends to vascillate between ‘I’m doing great’ and ‘That was really awful’ – back and forth, back and forth like a ping-pong ball. I’ve been shocked sometimes after a church service when someone says, ‘that song truly ministered to me,’ and it was the very song I thought fell flat. There have been other times when I’ve gotten goose bumps over a song that’s really come together after hours of rehearsal, and I hear nothing from individuals in the congregation. While we can easily become too reactive to feedback or the lack of it, I believe when we are offering our best to God, He will bless our efforts. We can just rest in that.
As followers of Christ we want to serve Him faithfully. Sometimes watching others serve, and comparing ourselves to others, can get in the way of giving OUR best. We can’t serve faithfully by either mimicking, or by condemning, someone else’s efforts – each of us is unique. We stay on track when we keep our eyes on the One we serve, and when we remain true to Him, and to ourselves.
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